Why relationships are the highest form of mindfulness practice

[MUSIC PLAYING] Goals for individuals or with individualistic ideals, maybe, we want more something different or better for ourselves,

but how can externalizing some of these goals also help with relationships?

Yeah, I feel like relationships are the highest form of mindfulness practice. It teaches us so much about ourselves and the other person.

And I think it's really important for us to always own 100% of our 50%.

Relationships are reciprocal. And I think, a lot of the times, it's easier for us to state our wants or needs or desires,

but how often do we put ourselves in the other's position? How do I be a better partner? How do I show up in a more loving way?

How can I be more kind? How can I be more attentive? So I think it's really important for everybody to always take responsibility, take ownership, and show up

wholeheartedly to your 50%. 100% of your 50%.

So let's say someone wants to work on their relationships, whether it's a romantic relationships, friendship, or family, et cetera.

How do you start having the conversation with your client who wants to work on those relationships? Where does that conversation start?

I have three things that I like to say at the beginning of having this kind of conversation. The first is that you really want

to be clear about what is safe. Meaning that you create an environment that is safe for you to be emotionally vulnerable.

So you want to look at, what do you need from the other person in order to feel safe and communicate that? What do you need from your environment in which you're

having the conversation? Do you need to have things that are, like, the dog is put up, the kids are asleep? And the third thing is, what do you need

to provide safety for yourself? Do you need to make sure you're rested and you're not hungry? Do you need to make sure that you're not feeling stressed in order to bring your best self to that conversation

and to the thought process of what you want to have changed? Sometimes, we think that if we dance around something or we're careful with our words that that's actually going

to get us more what we want, and it doesn't. You need to be clear and concise. You also-- and the third thing is this.

Is you need to realize, it's a give and take. So you bring yourself to the table. You be a person that the other person

can feel safe enough to bring themselves to the conversation. And then you get to decide what's right for your relationship, not what everyone else says.

The two of you together get to decide what you need and want. [AUDIO LOGO]