Telling your friends and family about your early breast cancer diagnosis

Kristi Funk, MD shares essential insights and practical advice for individuals wanting to share their breast cancer diagnosis.

Transcript

00:00

Telling the people in your life about your early breast cancer diagnosis can be hard. Who do you tell, and what do you say?

00:07

Let me help you find the words. [GENTLE MUSIC]

00:15

Before you decide to talk to anyone about your early breast cancer diagnosis, ask yourself, am I ready to talk about this yet?

00:23

The answer may be no, and that's OK. My best advice? Be selective about sharing your situation with people

00:31

in the early days before you fully understand the cancer details and have a plan in place.

00:37

It's wise to only tell people whose opinions and support will bring calmness and clarity to the decision-making at hand.

00:45

Most people tend to start with their spouse or partner and work outwards from there. You might start by telling these folks how you're feeling,

00:53

no matter what it is. Maybe you're feeling optimistic. And with early stage, you should be. But maybe you're not.

01:00

Maybe you're sad, or scared, or both. That's OK too. It might also help to talk about your prognosis

01:07

and remind them that an early-stage breast cancer diagnosis is very curable. In fact, a stage 1 breast cancer has a five-year survival rate

01:17

between 98% to 100%. In doctor talk, five-year survival does not mean you die year six.

01:24

You see, we publish 5, 10, and even 30-year survival rates because treatments improve all the time.

01:31

Think about it this way, a 30-year survival reflects treatments that are at least 30 years old.

01:37

And you want statistics that reflect the treatment strategy that you will follow, not what your grandmother did. And you can remind your loved ones

01:45

that doctors are getting better at treating cancer every day. Just remember, not everyone is going

01:52

to know what to say back to you. And that's OK. They love and care for you, and this news may come as a shock.

01:58

It's OK to be together in silence as they process. Finally, don't be afraid to ask for help,

02:06

whether it's cooking, cleaning, child care, or something else. Remember, it's not easy to talk about this,

02:13

but it will probably make you feel better. There's no one-size-fits-all approach. What works best for you will be unique to you.

02:21

Give yourself grace. [AUDIO LOGO]